Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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