Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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