i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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