Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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