pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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