My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
