Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
wow bdsm is so cute
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
