Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize