who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
