What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize