Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize