the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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