marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
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He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Found the puke drawer
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
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After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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