Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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