There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize