There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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