when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
