My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize