I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
