i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
