My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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