its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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