you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
