420 ftw
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
did you just send me my own nude
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
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