I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
