Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
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I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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