never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
