dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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