how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He kissed a someone with a penis
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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