Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
In America we eat man semen.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
