He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
