I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
