Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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