You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
