why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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