Whatcha textin bout Willis?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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