Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Lets date for the summer

  (815): View more from Illinois

  what?

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Dont love me in September.

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  (480): Lets date for the summer (815): what? (480): Dont love me in September. http://tfl.nu/x30e
  Replies (8) Good night (2271) Bad night (827)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother

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  (806): Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother http://tfl.nu/jjym
  Replies (7) Good night (2860) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.

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  (978): My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober. http://tfl.nu/yr07
  Replies (13) Good night (4611) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...

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  (717): and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived... http://tfl.nu/vut2
  Replies (11) Good night (2239) Bad night (3839)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly

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  (443): She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly http://tfl.nu/4li6
  Replies (15) Good night (3865) Bad night (1498)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.

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  (215): Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too. http://tfl.nu/we0x
  Replies (12) Good night (4863) Bad night (1195)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.

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  (850): Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day. http://tfl.nu/xqgd
  Replies (13) Good night (4309) Bad night (1383)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple

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  (401): After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple http://tfl.nu/1d3q
  Replies (11) Good night (4295) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me

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  (850): It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me http://tfl.nu/a5dr
  Replies (4) Good night (2649) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  my self respect just called, its having a good time without me

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  (856): my self respect just called, its having a good time without me http://tfl.nu/iprn
  Replies (9) Good night (3181) Bad night (1149)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer

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  (410): The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer http://tfl.nu/0sxh
  Replies (5) Good night (1573) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.

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  (307): this is worse than the time i threw up a condom. http://tfl.nu/98sx
  Replies (15) Good night (911) Bad night (4996)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!

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  (803): I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score! http://tfl.nu/zwep
  Replies (2) Good night (405) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.

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  (225): I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams. http://tfl.nu/g2d9
  Replies (2) Good night (421) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.

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  (308): You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture. http://tfl.nu/dxd6
  Replies (1) Good night (404) Bad night (294)

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