I hate all girls vehemently.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.