i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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