thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Randomize