are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
