Plan B is the new Plan A
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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