ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
jump out the window naked night went bad
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