it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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