He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
