Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize