At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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