he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
