I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize