i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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