Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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