I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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