If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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